People with herpes should wear stickers.
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
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