i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
