U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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