Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
