whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Randomize
