people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
The beers last night were like the tears from god
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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