the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
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