Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
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