Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Randomize
