i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
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