so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
Randomize
