I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Randomize
