so that wasnt chicken after all
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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