She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Randomize
