I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
Randomize
