This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Randomize
