I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
Randomize
