Heybabeimwearingurpanties
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
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