She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
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