dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
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