Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
it wasn't lemon gatorade
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
my shit smells like andre
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize
