just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
I have fence marks all over my body
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
Randomize
