I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
Randomize
