I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
