im at the bar and i misjudged a fart...go home or ride the night out?Never mind, the bouncer made the decision for me...be home soon
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
You left your phone here
Wait...
Randomize