Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
Randomize
