This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
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