so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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