i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
