I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
Randomize
