the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Randomize
