reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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