Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
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