if i died would you start the facebook group?
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
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