we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
Randomize
