i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Randomize
