Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
