i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
