thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
And then my night got REAL pukey
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
