I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
