Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
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