I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
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