You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
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