Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
Randomize
