Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
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