Quick, to the slutcave!
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
Randomize