Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
