dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
Randomize
