Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
