your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
where are my eyebrows?
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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