so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Randomize
