We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
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